As I mentioned here, I have a serious problem with letting go of grudges.
It's always been a struggle of mine and as I get older (and wiser!) I think I am finally starting to figure out why I am the way I am.
I honestly consider myself to be a genuinely nice person. Yes, I have a mean girl inside that likes to make an appearance sometimes but I can't ever remember a time when I was mean to someone or hurt someone for no reason at all. I guess I expect the same from others.
So when someone does hurt me, even if it's in the slightest way, I wonder why. What did I do? What did I say? I wonder to the point that it eats me up inside, ruins my day(s), and probably affects me a lot more than it does them.
I'm finally realizing that we aren't all built the same.. that not everyone is the kind of friend that I want them to be.. that the things that hurt my feelings may not hurt theirs.. that some people just don't care about the same things that I care about. And (maybe most importantly) that some people are just assholes.
As usual, I've learned these things the hard way.
Let me clarify that just because someone is different, does not mean that I think they're an asshole (unless of course they are an asshole :)). I just need to remind myself not to expect everyone to view life and relationships like I do. That just sets me up for disappointment.
Not everyone I meet is going to become my best friend. Not everyone I meet is going to like me.
And that's ok.
Please tell me I'm not the only person who thinks like this!
How do you let go, move on, and rid of a grudge? This isn't a rhetorical question. I really want to know!